I remember sitting on the edge of my bed, staring at my exercise shoes. Just weeks earlier, I was coaching CrossFit classes and pushing through workouts most people would call insane. But that morning, I could barely muster the strength to walk across the room. My joints ached, my head was foggy, and the fatigue felt like a heavy blanket I couldn’t peel off.

At that moment, I was scared. Scared I’d never feel strong again. Scared this was just my “new normal.”

When I look at myself, it's not the present me that I see. I don't see a body with a shaky left side or an arm that has become weak and hard to use. I don't see the aches and pains, brain fog, or fatigue that can at times be all consuming.

I see the future. My body's strong and stable, ready to tackle any hike, bike ride, or challenging workout. I can imagine muscles reappearing and my squishy middle disappearing. Chronic aches and pains and unrelenting fatigue are replaced by soreness from exercising with heavy weights again and comfortable tiredness after a day well spent and a body well used.

Yesterday I walked 7,814 steps (3.5 miles) which I know doesn't seem like much, but to me it was like conquering Mount Everest.

Let me put it into perspective...

At 36, I was diagnosed with systemic lupus. The rheumatologist told me I’d never get better, handed me a stack of prescriptions, and offered little hope. I never filled those scripts. Instead, I found a naturopath who actually listened to me. She ran functional labs, gave me a personalized plan, and most importantly, gave me hope. Within months, my energy returned, my hair stopped falling out, and I started feeling like me again.

That’s when I discovered CrossFit. It changed everything. Not only did I regain my physical strength, I found a powerful mindset shift. I learned I could do hard things. I built community. I adopted a paleo lifestyle. For the first time in two decades, I was thriving